I am a prodomme and author, check out my sites: howtobeadomme.com and mistresssays.com.
I am a lifestyle domme only in the sense that I am a woman in charge or my life, my household and my business. I do not live with slaves chained to my wall, but I encourage others to do so if they love it! Bdsm is an expression of love, emotions and of course sexuality. It is a theatre or an art in which we transform everyday situations into playful, fun fantasy. It is a world in which a demure woman or big businessman can be a whore for a day, or a petite trans person can run the show in black leather.
I am so happy to have finally started my blog, I have a lot to share with you. This will be my little morning escape, I need a vacation!
Thursday 14 July 2011
Booking with a Dominatrix
After many years of dealing with clients I have had the urge many times to try and educate men on how to properly communicate with us. Granted some don't care, while the ones reading this probably already know how to do it properly. It's the others in between I am addressing now.
The bottom line is that when potential clients are contacting us they are in a fantasy head space which makes them unable to communicate effectively. Some who contact me are not serious and do not really have money or the intention of showing up. In my book I repeat that there is only one type of client dommes need, those who can book and show up to appointments for sessions.
It doesn't sound hard does it? Truthfully, it may be. Men often have to hide their visits and their communication with us from wives, friends co-workers etc. So making and keeping an appointment is not that easy. Often however they don't show up, don't apologize, get blacklisted, and nobody wins.
If they can't swing it and or show up, they should not be wasting our time. We take many risks too in order to do what we do.
I created a video with one of my subs to illustrate the proper way to communicate with a dommes:
http://www.youtube.com/user/EvangellineDubois
Here's an example of an email I would take seriously:
Dear Ms Dubois,
I am interested to see you at 4pm on July 30, for corporal punishment. Please tell me if you are free and if you have any questions or directions for me.
Yours,
Michael Black
See how a simple and courteous email can be to the point and effective?
The bottom line is that when potential clients are contacting us they are in a fantasy head space which makes them unable to communicate effectively. Some who contact me are not serious and do not really have money or the intention of showing up. In my book I repeat that there is only one type of client dommes need, those who can book and show up to appointments for sessions.
It doesn't sound hard does it? Truthfully, it may be. Men often have to hide their visits and their communication with us from wives, friends co-workers etc. So making and keeping an appointment is not that easy. Often however they don't show up, don't apologize, get blacklisted, and nobody wins.
If they can't swing it and or show up, they should not be wasting our time. We take many risks too in order to do what we do.
I created a video with one of my subs to illustrate the proper way to communicate with a dommes:
http://www.youtube.com/user/EvangellineDubois
Here's an example of an email I would take seriously:
Dear Ms Dubois,
I am interested to see you at 4pm on July 30, for corporal punishment. Please tell me if you are free and if you have any questions or directions for me.
Yours,
Michael Black
See how a simple and courteous email can be to the point and effective?
Test Blog
Hello Readers,
It gives me pleasure to begin communicating with you this way. I am an author and video maker, and professional Dominatrix. My book, "How To Be A Domme, The Practical Guide To Becoming A Dominatrix" is available for purchase at www.howtobeadomme.com.
The reason I wrote this book is because when I was starting out I had to learn everything through trial and error. Mostly good experiences to learn from, however, I had 2 friends with me during my journey, while there are women out there who want to learn but may have no support. There are crucial safety and boundary issues prodommes deal with, and my book helps women to understand these important aspects of the job.
Speaking so, being a prodomme IS a REAL job. This is something our clients and sometimes friends and family may not understand. Our clients think we are lifestyle dommes and that we don't need the same things that other professions require, such as money, appointments, confirmations, personal boundaries, etc. This can be problematic when running a business.
Being a prodomme is more than simply having a job, it is running a business, a sometimes risky one at that. My book was designed to help women and others interested in the profession.
Friends and family may not understand your new job at first, or at all. This is what I tell them: there are people out there who are desperate for this experience, which after acting out their fantasy however bizaare, helps them to go back to their regular life and focus. It is a relatively safe and harmless activity, which helps submissives get to the center of their feelings, and since when are men allowed to do such a thing?
Men and women are both prone to stress, and bdsm or seeing a prodomme is one way to renew the self, escape and come back to reality feeling cleansed and energized.
That's not to say it isn't risky, but that's another blog.
It gives me pleasure to begin communicating with you this way. I am an author and video maker, and professional Dominatrix. My book, "How To Be A Domme, The Practical Guide To Becoming A Dominatrix" is available for purchase at www.howtobeadomme.com.
The reason I wrote this book is because when I was starting out I had to learn everything through trial and error. Mostly good experiences to learn from, however, I had 2 friends with me during my journey, while there are women out there who want to learn but may have no support. There are crucial safety and boundary issues prodommes deal with, and my book helps women to understand these important aspects of the job.
Speaking so, being a prodomme IS a REAL job. This is something our clients and sometimes friends and family may not understand. Our clients think we are lifestyle dommes and that we don't need the same things that other professions require, such as money, appointments, confirmations, personal boundaries, etc. This can be problematic when running a business.
Being a prodomme is more than simply having a job, it is running a business, a sometimes risky one at that. My book was designed to help women and others interested in the profession.
Friends and family may not understand your new job at first, or at all. This is what I tell them: there are people out there who are desperate for this experience, which after acting out their fantasy however bizaare, helps them to go back to their regular life and focus. It is a relatively safe and harmless activity, which helps submissives get to the center of their feelings, and since when are men allowed to do such a thing?
Men and women are both prone to stress, and bdsm or seeing a prodomme is one way to renew the self, escape and come back to reality feeling cleansed and energized.
That's not to say it isn't risky, but that's another blog.
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